Things that go bump in the dryer - the cat!

I'm trying SO hard to make forward movement right now. However, some days, I feel like my feet are glued to the same spot.  But, as I seem so stuck right now, I continue to watch friends (known and unknown) come beside me to help. In the last few days, I've had SO many people reach out. Some offering prayer, some offering a good laugh, some offering gift cards, and some simply standing by silently waiting for me to signal the need for their presence. For the last two days, Grant has handed me mail from friends I haven't seen in years with notes of encouragement. Wow. My heart is grateful and I feel so loved and supported. Tomorrow night, my small group will descend on my house and make the HOA take me off of their naughty list! Once again, another blessing that will fill a void.

But, like always, I lose sight of my blessings when the crap hits the fan. For example, today, Annie decided to "help" with the laundry. She threw things in the dryer (and at the dryer) as I unloaded them from the washer. She did NOT announce to me, though, that the cat had jumped into the dryer. Yep. The cat. My cat. My poor OLD cat! And, yes, I slammed the dryer door and turned it on. Thankfully, I heard the awkward thumping and opened the door to see a very stunned cat leap from the dryer. These are the kinds of incidents that just stop me in my tracks. Something as simple as getting laundry done turns into a near calamity. Yes, I do find the humor in it now (the cat still doesn't) but at the moment, I just had to stand still and swallow the lump that formed in my throat.

I have gotten quite a bit of school work done today which has made me feel quite productive, though. I'm SO ready to go back! Today, as I walked through the drug store (buying MORE MiraLax for Annie), I smelled crayons (Crayola - not those weird Rose Art ones) and I got excited. That smell means that it's almost time for me to get back to a productive routine. Whew! I've never been great with managing time during the summer but this summer, I have sucked at it! It's too hard to keep everyone busy without spending money AND finding something that will appease a 2, 11 and 13 year old with very different interests and ability levels! I'm counting down the days!

We did manage a trip to the theater today, as well. Some friends gave us a movie gift card a while back. I'd been saving it to use when I was at wits end. I'm beginning to think that I've been at that destination for quite some time but just didn't see the road sign! We saw Zoo Keeper. It was really cute and didn't have the usual sexual innuendos, crude jokes, and rude language (minus 2 ugly words). It was fun. We were the only ones in the theater and sat in the first row of the upper deck so Annie had a huge area to run around in while the rest of us watched. It was all fun and games until she started climbing over the backs of the seats leading down to the lower level. And she really enjoyed popping the seats open and closed. Oh well. It was a nice treat that made us feel like we'd done something exciting.

So, tomorrow, I will finish doing the laundry while making certain that the cat is NOT in the spin cycle or the dryer! I think we'll try to hit the $1 movie at the mall in the morning, too. However, I'm not sure that popcorn and candy (smuggled in) for lunch two days in a row will rank really high on the nutrition charts but, hey, it's summer! Then, tomorrow night, I'm meeting with a new counselor. I have to find some way to put all of these questions that keep berating me to rest because it's pretty obvious that I'm never going to get the answers. I'm also hoping to find some help with getting rid of this stupid dream that keeps haunting me. I've never had anything like this happen before. It's the same dream. Sometimes, the background changes but the people and the plot are always identical and leave me waking up at the same point. My MD suggested staying in bed and imagining the rest of the story the way I want it to end. Did that. Didn't keep the dream from returning. I'm also going to see the MD tomorrow, as well. Lack of sleep can wreak havoc on your blood sugar. I'm just amazed that I don't feel overly exhausted during the day. Maybe my body has just adjusted to the different sleep schedule like it does when you have a newborn. Who knows! I just know that I have to take care of ME and that means seeing doctors and shrinks right now. So be it.

When this chapter of my life finally closes and I'm able to start the next chapter, I need to be capable of playing the starring role without being comatose or locked up in some sort of padded room! I also need to be able to take care of the support actors so that they'll be able to do what they need to!