Boat Left Without You but Martha Stewart Will Be Here Shortly

Waiting for the big kids while they were at choir practice. Belly dancing in front of the church... Does anyone know this child?

Bad idea #259. Yes, I got her into the swing because SHE wanted in THAT swing. However, I thought I was going to have to flip the swing upside down and pop her out of it like a piece of stuck toast in a toaster. She was not amused with my skills. My back is still not amused with the moves I had to execute to get this chunky monkey out of the elfin-sized swing.

No caption for this needed. No, it did not end well for either participant.

Thing 1 and Thing 3 decided to play hide-and-seek. Annie kept hiding in the same spot. It suprised me that she went into the pantry and closed the door without screaming about it being dark inside.

Annie was counting for Grant to hide. I wish I'd recorded it. She can only count to 15. She just kept counting to 15 over and over again! (Grant was in the hot stinky garage. I would have NEVER encouraged Annie to count to 15 about 100 times. Ok. Maybe I did... )!

Stripe is officially cocooned. Annie is now asking when he's going to wake up. Um... I don't know. I guess I should Google it. They didn't cover exact dates in The Very Hungry Caterpillar.

So, here's how the day went...

I tried to get the big kids up and ready for church this morning. I always threaten them with, "The boat is going to leave without you!" Well, this morning, the boat undocked and did pull away without two crew members. I'm sick and tired of waiting on them to do things that they've been told to do a million times. As I left, I told them that the floor had better shine like the top of the Chrysler Building when I returned. Oh, wait. That was Ms. Hanagan from Annie that said that. I guess I sort of felt like a cross between Ms. Hanagan, Cruela de Ville, and and officer from COPS this morning. But, I did tell both kids that their rooms had better be spotless and their bathrooms had better look brand new when I returned three hours later. Then, the boat left. Annie was very confused but I just told her that the big kids hadn't followed directions. Maybe that'll give her something to think about the next time I ask her to do something!

I went on to church. I dropped Annie at her class and headed back to the singles class where I planned to sneak in the back and not have to speak or be spoken to. Crap, crap, crap. When I got there, there were only two other people there. I looked around and literally spun around to leave before one of the other ladies spoke to me. Dang it. No escape. So, I sat there feeling like a trapped animal. I waited for Jello girl and the alien watcher to show up. However, no one came. The teacher was out of town, too, so one of the students was leading class. He started up the "discussion" and kept asking for people to read verses for him. I was the only one with my Bible so he was basically saying, "Hey, you with the Bible, read these verses!" Really? Fine if you don't carry your Bible with your but... there's an app for that! Pull it up on your ever-loving phone! I've got to admit that I was a snot wad. Yes, I read and yes I spoke but I was not happy about it. After about 40 minutes, the Jello girl came giggling into class. Today, it was more like green moldy Jello and not bright blood red Jello. She marched to the front of the room. Plopped down directly in front of the instructor and then proceeded to turn around and hug, talk with, and laugh with the girl behind her. Really? I felt bad for the instructor. He was having a tough enough time without having to talk over Bubblelicious. How rude! But, he trudged on with the lesson. She continued to argue points with him and one-up him. Southern grace and poise, she does not have. Why in this world does she bother me so much? She doesn't even know who I am or that I exsit.

So, I sat through class and then headed for choir. No drama there other than trying to stay awake. And, today was the Lord's Supper. They tried a new combination cup that contained the grape juice in one section and the bread in another. As the bread was eaten, some guys behind me in the choir started wondering if they'd eaten the wrapper instead of the bread because of the taste. Then, they decided in agreement that they'd just eaten a styrafoam packing peanut. Geez. Boys never grow up. (I didn't disagree with them - just their timing). Oh, and I had blood sugar issues last night so I had very little sleep. I kept myself awake for the remainder of the service by trying to count the average number of people on each pew and then calculate how many people were downstairs and in the balcony. I know. Horrible. I will go back and listen to the message when it's uploaded. I just simply couldn't keep my eyes open this morning.

I picked Annie up and headed home to see how much work the convicts had gotten done. Then, I saw it. My blood started to boil. Guess whose car was parked in the driveway? When I opened the door, her cleaning box was sitting in the foryer. Are you kidding me? She skipped church to do the kids' cleaning that was supposed to be a punishment for dragging their butts and being disrespectful? Game over. About that time, her sidekick came walking out of the garage with a piece of chalk in his hand. He'd been drawing off exactly where my demo project needed to happen. AHHHHHH!!!!! She then proceeded to fix the kids hot dogs, french fries, and tea. (I asked her to stop bringing Coke for the kids so she brought sweet tea instead). She obvioulsy sensed my outrage and started telling me that they'd just gotten there. Really? You brought your own vaccuum clearner over. I think you've been here for more than just a few minutes. The whole house already smelled like Lysol. Seriously. I mean no disrepect. However, I issued a punishment and the kids ended up getting pampered by Martha Stewart. It really felt like an episode from Everyone Loves Raymond.

So, they left and I put the girls down for a nap and tried to crash myself. However, my bloodsugar started crashing agin instead. This is really getting old. If you've never had your blood sugar bottom out suddenly, you probably wouldn't know the nauseous nasty feeling that signals things aren't going in the right direction. So, I grabbed a spoon of peanut butter and laid down hoping that things would level off.

Then, I took the kids back to church for choir. (Oh, did I mention that Grant got sassy and decided that he didn't want to go). Anyway, I took Annie to the park while they were at practice. However, while at the park, my blood sugar dropped again so we just went home afterwards. Oh well.

Kids bathed, bedded, and now it's finally quiet. I'm still monitoring my blood sugar looking for some sort of pattern to this craziness. I've been grazing on a mix of Cheerios, raisens, peanuts, and M&Ms for the last four hours but I'm still not getting the boost in numbers that I need. I don't want to have to open that dumb emergency injection of glycogol or whatever it is. Do you know what one pop of that stuff costs? Oh well. I'm exhausted and ready to fall asleep but I don't dare do so until I know my numbers have leveled off.

Take away from today? There are seasons to our lives. In some seasons, things wither and die. However, spring will come again and things will grow. I sure hope I'm in the dead of winter because everything around me seems dead. When will spring get here? I'm rather impatient.

Good night, all.