6:00 a.m. - Annie crawls in bed with me. I try to snuggle her under the covers in hopes that she'll go back to sleep only to find out that she's naked from the waist down and has just peed in my bed. I'm not kidding, folks. The girl has a serious thing for peeing in my bed. Why? Why can't she mark her own territory? It's a whole lot easier to strip a toddler bed and change the linens than a freaking king sized bed! Argh. Good morning!
7:00 a.m. - Laundry is started and Annie has been fed. I started vacuuming the rugs so I could pull them up and use a real mop (not a Swiffer) to clean the floors. Blah. I hate real mops. They take too much effort.
8:00 a.m. - 2:00 p.m. - I'm not sure where this time went but I think it got sucked into a time vaporizer. I know I cleaned out the gazillion products from under the kitchen sink. (Minor melt down over tossing the orange hand cleaner stuff that Eric used to get grease off of his hands). Annie napped. I got Dasha started on finishing up her book report. And, Grant came home with all of his stinky belongings in tow.
From there, it was sort of like a downhill ride. The more help I tried to give Dasha, the more combative she got. Grant was sound asleep upstairs trying to recoup two nights worth of sleep in a couple of hours. Annie was, well, as she usually is - everywhere.
By 5:00, Dasha was still at the table working. She'd had several breaks but she hadn't made much progress. At that point, I finally told her that I was going to set the timer and she had to have the essay outline finished. What was I supposed to do? She didn't want my help but she hadn't even completely finished reading the stupid book (remember, the one about Judy Blume and sex)? At some point, my mom was kind enough to drop some dinner off. I gave Dasha a break and Annie decided that she wanted to "paint." That's what she calls using markers.
So, that's how the evening went. The kids all alternated taking turns to see who could produce the most drama. Grant wanted my undivided attention (meaning don't look at Annie when she's crying, don't look at Dasha if she throws something, and surely don't swat at the cat for clawing at the rug). Annie just seemed to want to be hysterical for anything she deemed uncooperative such as, well, everything. And then, there was Dasha. At some point in this whole debacle, I took Annie upstairs to give her a bath. While I was doing that, Dasha erased EVERYTHING that she'd done over the last six hours. Not just a sentence or two. Everything. Poof. Vanished. Gone. When I tried to calmly ask why she'd erased it all, she just said that she didn't think it was right. I think I remember my explicative filter blinking "overload" and then saying something to her like, "Well, something that was wrong was better than the nothing you have there now!" At that point, I had to text Eric and tell him to take over the show. He Skyped with her for a while but she just doesn't get it. She does not put any value in doing work for the sake of learning. She puts value into not getting into trouble for not doing the work and getting caught, though. I can't wrap my mind around it. Now, I know that 13 year olds don't walk around saying, "Oh goody! I get to learn something today to fill up this cavernous noggin sitting on my neck!" But she just doesn't care at all. So, when I'd adequately calmed down, listened to Grant retell every detail of his camping weekend, and put Annie to bed, I tried to reason with Dasha. Why do I do this? It just frustrates me more. I tried to explain the value in reading a book and showing the teacher the things you learned but she just sat there and stared through me. Then, it's like she just snapped. She propelled her head forward and smacked it square on the table. Again, and again, and again. I told her to stop. I told her she was going to hurt herself. It's like I was talking to a wall. When I finally grabber her, she had quite a mark on her forehead. Once again, I tried to reason with her about not hurting herself. Once again, my reasoning did not resonate. I tried to refocus her and figure out if there was any use in trying to even complete the project. I mean, you can only whack your head so many times before work becomes counter-productive. Strangely enough, she seemed to settled back into the idea of finishing her project and started working again. I edged a few feet away into the kitchen to try to put the dishes away. She started talking to me about her classes at school and it was like she didn't even remember what had just transpired. It was like she just hit "skip" and skipped ahead by 15 minutes - not even fast forward - I mean skipped. When I started talking to her (on her terms because I was really getting freaked out), she told me that she would act better when things went back to "normal." Ok. That's a great statement if I knew what "normal" meant. So, I asked her. Unbeknownst to me, that was not the correct question to ask. She got mad again and started yanking at her hair as she answered me. She said, "Normal is when I won't have to do this hard work anymore and things are fun!" If I hadn't been so freaked out, my sarcastic mind would have probably spewed something out like, "Good luck with that! I guess you'll never see normal, then!" No, I didn't say that but the whole situation was just crazy!
A few more minutes passed and she seemed calm again. I told her to go on to bed. No, once again, the project is not finished but I can't do this crazy stuff. Is this some sort of hormonal thing or is this really something bigger? I've mentioned this to the psychologist and their thought is that it is the only way she knows to manipulate situations but this was just... creepy. There's even a little piece of me that wonders if I should put the baby gate in front of her door tonight to make sure she stays put. I admit. I'm a little afraid of her when she gets like this. She might be little for her age but she is strong as an ox. Ugh. So, she went on upstairs and left me trying to find my bearings. When I did go upstairs to trade out loads of laundry, I heard her riffling around downstairs in the glass jar where I keep pencils. (Every sound in this house is amplified with these hardwood floors)! I went down to see what she was doing and I just stood there astounded. She was taking the mechanical pencils from her book bag and putting them back into a package of new ones through a little hole in the back. I didn't even know the bag was opened. When I asked her what she was doing, I scared her to death. She told me she was getting a new pencil for school. Ok. Nothing wrong with that. (I've been giving her mechanical ones because she can gnaw on the plastic without it actually coming off like the wooden ones). But why was she sneaking them and putting the old ones back in? I didn't even ask. I just opened the package and dumped them all onto the counter and picked out the ones with used erasers (my clue that those were the old ones). She watched me do this but said nothing. Then, she went to bed.
Someone help me. I'm not cut out for this! I've been working with kids for 15 years. I have three degrees in dealing with kids. I have special needs kids in my classroom most years. But this? And the other baffling thing is that the teachers at school never see this sort of behavior. I feel like they think I'm making this stuff up. Why? Like I have time to sit around and dream up this mess. Poor Grant has gotten really good at staying under the radar and keeping Annie with him when these things break out. Tonight, he ended up diapering Annie and dressing her for bed because I was dealing with Dasha. He even baked the cookie dough mom brought and then Annie helped herself to an undisclosed number of cookies using her blasted step stool again. That thing is going to have to go!
Like I said, all I want is one drama free day. No book reports. No divas. Just quiet and calm.
So, now I'll head to bed and fold clothes for the next hour to even uncover my bed. Blah. I'm going to invent disposable clothes that you don't have to launder, fold, or put away. You just pull out a nice new set each day. That's what I need!
Good night, all.
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