Randolph History 103: The Saga Continues

OK - After Ansley's death, things were very rough for our marriage. Our common goal had been financial survival and tending to Ansley's needs. Without those goals, we didn't think we had anything to fight for. Yes, Grant was our everything and he was definitely worth fighting for but we were weary with fighting and wanted to take an easy way out. Eric's boss at Chick-fil-A offered us a scholarship to a marriage "retreat" at Camp Winshape. We accepted not knowing what to expect. The four day retreat turned out to be more like isolation in a Pottery Barn-ish cabin with the support of a marriage counselor. Talk about intense! Eric and I found out things about each other and ourselves that I don't know if we'd even had revealed in twenty years of marriage. (Some of those things I think I could have done without knowing) ! :) Bottom line, the support of others and another reminder of God's sovereignty and grace put our marriage back on the "viable" market. Things didn't change over night but we could see the light at the end of the tunnel. (I'm still working toward that light)!

With our marriage back on the right path, we began to think about our family. We joined the church that had supported us and the class that had provided for us. More than that, we got ourselves right with God. He had given us such a gift in our short time with Ansley and such a peace throughout her illness. Eric and I both had to realize that we'd cluttered up our lives and moved away from God. All we had to do was move the clutter and run back into those outstretched arms. I'm sure not saying that we didn't experience the pain and grief of losing a child. We were able to experience that grief from within the confines of the knowledge that "all things happen for a reason" (Romans 8:28).

As time passed, we began to think about our options for expanding our family. We had a 25% chance of having another Pompe's child. We weren't comfortable with the uncertainty of foster care. We did have to think about Grant's development, as well. However, in August of 2004, our path was made clear in a very odd way. A friend of ours had mentioned a group that brought East European children to the US each Christmas and summer for visits. Most of these children were available for adoption, as well. We'd been receiving email from this group from several months but hadn't paid too much attention to them. We did NOT have the finances to pay for airfare or any of the other requirements for one of these orphans. Ha, ha, ha.

Eric and I both opened up the email with the pictures of the kids coming for the Christmas 2004 hosting. He opened the email at home and I opened it at school. We both saw the same six year old and both told ourselves, "NO WAY!" The bio of this child said that she had respiratory issues, couldn't walk, and had some vision problems. We'd already "been there and done that" with medical issues. However, I couldn't get the little girl out of my mind. Her given name was Daria. Unbeknown to me, Eric couldn't get her out of his mind either. Through a series of emails, we finally found out that God had laid the little girl on both of our hearts. Our final email said something like, "What do we do?" The smart person would have responded, "Do what God wants you to do." However, those of us that are too smart for our own good try to use "reason." We eventually called the hosting agency and were told that the agency hadn't agreed to let anyone host the child because they were waiting on the "right" family. Great. God has a way of working things out even if we don't cooperate! Long story short, Daria was slotted to spend Christmas 2004 with our family. However, a few weeks before she was to arrive, we were told that she was going to have spinal surgery in Russia to fix her "toe walking." I have to admit that I was almost relieved. I'd just spent several months being house bound with a terminally ill infant. Now, I was going to be house bound with a handicapped Russian child who couldn't speak English. Hmmm. Might sound selfish but it's the truth! I think I had my own personal little victory party. A week before the orphans were to arrive, we got a phone call about 7:00 a.m. that simply said, "Check your email." The email said that Russian doctors had decided to let Daria come to the US instead of doing spinal surgery. They thought the US experience would do her a world of good and the surgery could be rescheduled. OK. My very mature mindset was completely unraveled. This was going to happen no matter what I wanted. On December 7, 2004, Daria arrived at Hartfield Airport in Atlanta and came to live at the House of Randolph for a few weeks.