Nitty gritty...

 Picture this. You're sitting in a peaceful spot that your husband created just for you. There's soft music playing in the background. Two lovely girls are seated at the table working on summer school work. As I type, that's exactly what's going on here. Maybe. Sort of. Ok. You can stop laughing now and get a paper towel to sop up the water that you just shot out of your nose and mouth. I am seated in this perfect little nook that Ray helped create. However, the desk no longer looks this neat and tidy. There are crayons scattered all over the top now and little pictures from Annie are tucked onto, into, and around the shelves. There is also music playing. However, it can't really be heard over the racket the girls are making at the table arguing about why the word Kohl's is spelled K O H L S and not Cole's. I guess I should ask them their thoughts about Coal's. So, the truth of the matter is that I've finally tried to carve out some time to sit and write. The floor is littered with Hot Wheels cars. (The girls started making roads on poster board, but the game turned violent and they started folding the board into ramps and launching the cars at unsuspecting animals. The dog has currently taken cover under my desk, and the cat is peering out from the chair next to me). So, as you can tell, although time has passed since I last wrote, some things will always be the same around here! Controlled chaos will rein supreme and housework will be sacrificed for the sake of laughter.

In a very feeble attempt to catch everyone up to speed on this crazy life, I'm going to give you a few snippets of what's gone on around here over the last year. Please feel free to walk away from the computer as your mind becomes cloudy and you begin to drool with the lunacy that may ooze out from this point.

It's been almost a year since Ray and I got married. The learning curve on marriage between two psychos with completely different backgrounds is VERY steep! Can you imagine how he felt after about a month of coming home every day to face three stooges and a psychotic woman instead of
sauntering in the door to his cat and a calm quiet home? I think the first time we really vocalized the differences, Ray said, "I feel like I'm in a foreign land!" Over and over again, he tells me that the insanity is completely worth the blessing, though. (When he says that, I really want to ask him if we need to look into some medication for him, because that's just really hard to believe). Anyway, the roller coasters of combining someone who lived the bachelor life for almost forty years and someone who had become a certified control freak trying to keep a leaking boat afloat with three kids aboard has been fun at times, scary at others, but are well worth the loop-the-loops and mind blowing hills and dips.

Annie prefers that Ray fix her hair. She says that I am in too much of a rush. Ya think? If I get too "rough," she'll run off to find him.

I'll leave the whole wedded bliss soliloquy alone for now. That's a whole other topic.

For now, I'll just try to catch you up to speed on what's going on around here.

Dinner out to celebrate not eating at home and having to do dishes. Sounds legit, right?

I think Ray was surprised / mortified / in disbelief about  a teacher's job. Heck, I'm allowed to say it now, too. I'm surprised, mortified, and in disbelief about what teachers are called on to do. "Officials" continue to pack more and more students into classrooms and then want to hold teachers "accountable" by surveying students, looking at doctored up test scores, and reviewing observations (on which the good teachers get the same scores as the bad - just FYI), and then wonder "what went wrong?" So, at the end of the school year, I walked away. After 16 years, I walked away. It still doesn't seem real. However, I have some other opportunities brewing (one being writing). So, we shall see what happens and how long it takes me to either learn to be Martha Stewart and flip this house, or to simply lose my mind.

I'm not sure where time went. Dasha is 16, Annie 5, and Grant 14 (going on 40).

 However, since I'll be home, I will be able to devote more time to the chicken nuggets. (I can hear Grant moaning now)! Grant and Dasha will be in high school next year, and Annie will go to a small school three days a week. Yes, I'll be responsible for being the responsible party on the other two days. I'm actually looking forward to that part of this new journey. Unlike the big nuggets, Annie actually listens when I try to "teach" her. I'm sure that we'll have challenges, but, if nothing else, I can claim that the laundry didn't get done or dinner didn't get started because I was helping Annie. Right? The day I lose my excuses for those things, I'm sunk!

Despite his weirdness, Grant is still the Gentle Giant. He'll be doing marching band this year, and is really excited (do teens get excited?) about being part of the group.

 Grant is still Grant, though. His snarky comebacks always keep me in that twilight zone of trying to be the parent, but wanting to fall over laughing hysterically at the things he says. The boy is still infatuated with Legos, too. I'll never tire of passing by his room and seeing him sitting in the floor surrounded by Legos and GI Joes. I'm hoping that the Peter Pan syndrome will hold true on just that one little part of him. (I don't need him to "never grow up" completely, though. He needs to grow up and get a job so he can pay for his own Legos)!

 And then there's Dasha. Whew. I'm just not sure what to say on this account. While her chronological ages continues to increase, there are parts of her that definitely mature (yikes!!!!), but there are some parts that are still stuck in the late elementary stage. How do you parent a sixteen year old who has a range of emotions, social abilities, and physical abilities than range from about an eight year old to a twenty year old? Ray is INCREDIBLE with Dasha, though. Somehow, he never loses his patience with her, and can speak to her in a way that I'm simply not capable of doing. Dasha clings to Ray - literally and figuratively. We don't know what high school is going to bring for her. We're sort of at a "wait and see" status. While she needs the socialization, she just doesn't have the skills to navigate the social world of the average high schooler. (She was propositioned by another female student to be "special" friends toward the end of the school year. Grant got wind of the situation, and alerted us. Dasha had no idea that this girl didn't want to just be buddies. We tried to talk her through the whole situation, but then she decided to tell the pediatrician at her check up that she'd been in a romantic relationship with another girl. I can laugh about the whole ordeal now, but at the time, I was praying that God would suddenly render her completely speechless. The look the pediatrician gave me was priceless)! And, mobility wise, we just don't know what we're going to be up against. Dasha is back to wearing the braces that go up to her knees. I'm not sure if she's really falling any less, but... During her last year of middle school, she ended up with a broken finger at one point, and a broken hand due to falls. The high school campus is much larger with lots more kids jostling around. We shall see. But, beyond the crazy Dashaisms, she is still wonderful with Annie and loves to help around the house. Ray is working with her cooking skills. I normally stand back and get my drawers in a major knot worrying that she'll topple over and fall into a hot pan, but Ray is determined to help her find what she's great at. (I feel guilty sometimes because I never really looked at it that way).

 And, as for Annie... Whew! At five, she has the mental capacity of a NASA monkey. (If you aren't sure... that's way more capacity then I have). Annie loves to build and create things. She also loves to read and will attempt to sound out just about anything. Millions of times each day, she'll ask how to spell something.

When I left for the store, she was just getting started.

When I returned, it looked like this. I was sort of expecting that she'd have built a Transformer, though.

 Annie graduated kindergarten in May. At the end of the year conference, the teacher didn't even address the academic items. Her main concern was that Annie plays much better with adults than with children. Maybe the teacher thought I'd be offended by that statement. I just sort of had the Homer Simpon, "Duh," zip through my head.  Oh well. At least the teacher didn't tell me that she eats paste and boogers. (Although, that would be much easier to remediate)!

She doesn't like help. Anyone surprised?

Graduation day

 As for the rest of the family, everyone is hanging in there. Ethel and Fred are still up to their routine antics. Their newest adventure is the war that they've staged with the resident squirrel population. Each week, they add something to their arsenal of crazy things to combat the squirrels from getting to their almighty bird feeders. This week, they added empty 2-liter bottles to the ends of the line that the feeders dangle from.

 In an attempt to deter Fred's squirrel chasing, Ray decided that an RC airplane would be the ticket for Father's Day. However, I'm betting that by the end of the month, Ray will have one, as well, and the two boys will have disappeared somewhere to fly their toys. I'm so thankful for how well Ray and my dad get along. Although, I am afraid that if they ever decide to use their powers for evil, we might all be in for some trouble. (Anyone else imagine Fred using that plane to dive-bomb the neighbors' homes who don't keep their yards in tip-top condition)? Just saying!

So, as I finally wrap things up, the girls have finally stopped launching cars at the animals. They've moved on to arguing about who will get to help make the ba-sketti tonight, and which jobs are most important. Maybe I'll just hand them each a can of Chef Boyardee and let them work it out for themselves.

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Matthew 6:25 - 7:29